Varunavi's

Please talk to me

November 10, 2009 · 36 Comments

She  stares at the entrance of her room all the day to see someone,who talks to her,who hugs her.But retires to the bed in a hope that tomorrow someone will come,will talk to her and will take her from there.She is not alone in that room,there are many eyes glued to the entrance.The moment someone comes at the entrance,all try to get up from their bed calling the visitor to talk to them.

In this fast life we don’t have few minutes to spend with them.

They are ones who taught us our first walk and we don’t have time to hold there hand and help them take a few steps.

They are the ones who taught us our first words and we don’t have time to say few words to them.

They are the ones who fed us our choice of food,we when spitted the food given to us which we disliked and now we left them to others to feed them and they don’t have their choice of food.

They are the ones in their life time never repented of giving birth to us and we don’t repent of sending them to the old age homes.

They inspite of living in the old age homes pray for us.

They are not called home inspite of having a wedding at home,for fear of their death which leads to postpone of the marriage.The son and daughter-in-law are concerned for their daughter not for their mother and mother-in-law.

Inspite of earning well their kids fight for the contribution to be spent on their medical and old age home bills.

They are the ones who gave us  their name, their fame, their time, their money, their whole life are left in destitute because of us.

They are the ones who used to shed tears when we were sick and they took off from the office to look after us and now we don’t have time for them.

They celebrated our birthday’s and we don’t remember their birthdays.

What they want?? They don’t want our money and materialistic pleasure.They just want our love and few minutes of our valuable time.

We have time to take our kids out as we think kids should have fun,we have time to eat at a restaurant,we have time to watch our fav tv serial/program etc………… but we don’t have time to speak few words to them.

A recent survey shows  increase of old age homes in india, Hyderabad alone has 140 old age homes.Where are we heading ? We don’t know that what we did to our parents will happen to us.Maybe a day will come when parents think of not having a child as they are old age homes to take care of them.

I agree that few old age homes give good geriatric treatment but apart from the treatment they want love and someone to say few words to them.

Husband visited old age home when he went to india,there was a women who tried to give money to husband to buy a shirt similar to what hubby was wearing for her son.Her son is a stinking rich guy who doesn’t have time for his mother and rarely visits her.

My mom met her distant relative at a old age home and the relative said these words to mom– “I don’t have any income and i can do my work myself,you are getting pension no,please keep me with you”.

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I am elated…..

November 4, 2009 · 31 Comments

My post on domestic violence — Break the silence has been picked by BlogAdda for tangy tuesday picks.I can’t believe that my post has been picked up.

blogadda

Thanks to blogadda  team for selecting my post and thanks to my friends who read and encourage me with their comments.And special thanks to my classmate and friend liju who introduced me to the blogging and also thanks to my kids who allow me to take out my time for blogging.

Thanks sister for reading my blog and get well soon :)

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Break the silence

October 31, 2009 · 25 Comments

 October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.This is just a small contribution from me to spread the awareness of domestic violence.

Yesterday my neighbour rang my bell and before i would reach the door she ranged it twice,when i opened the door she came running into the house and closed the door and there was a panic in her face.On being asked what happened she said her husband came from the office and she doesn’t want to face him.My daughter is not at home,she went to grocery store.Then i said so,then she said you don’t know my husband he shouts a lot and he doesn’t like my daughter to go out on her own.Her daughter is  16 years old.If he thinks going to a grocery is a forbidden thing he can tell her why he doesn’t want her to go in a soft voice,why to shout at them.

Her husband is out of the house from morning 6.00 to evening 8.00 and he expects his wife to do everything like paying the bills,grocery etc and he shouts on her if the daughter goes to the grocery store to her help mom.This lady is educated and she is working and earns on par with her husband.But she is scared of her husband.Fear is in place of  love and trust.Why should she fear him? Why the kids should be scared of their father? He is a decent man,wishes you when ever he sees you,calls your kids and plays with them.What is wrong with him? Ok he comes home after a days long work and from long traffic jams,so he will vent his frustation and anger on his wife and kids.A women also does that? have anyone of you heard about a frustrated women venting her anger on her husband and kids ??

More than the physical abuse it is the mental abuse which goes unnoticed.Words don’t break bones they break hearts.

A close friend of mine has left her marriage after suffering for 4 long years,she says i suffered 4 years and will suffer for long because even after leaving the marriage my past taunts me.For this her parents brought her into this world,gave her education and married her to a decent family after making a good enquire about the family and house where their daughter will live forever.

She is mainly abused by her in-laws and husband is a mute spectator.For this he took seven vows to protect her.She is blamed for everything.When her m-law was sick she was blamed that she didn’t took good care of  her.Something happened in the house,her m-law said the day you put foot in our house we are runied.For this  her m-law selected this girl to be her son’s wife? She was blamed of not having kids inspite of she showing them reports that there is no problem with her and husband never went for a test.And this guy is very well-educated and has a good career but he didn’t allow her to work inspite of being educated on par with him.Leaving marriage was a good option for her as she has got a good support from the parents.It is more than one year she left the house but still she is not able to come out of that.Time heels but why should she suffer for no fault of hers ?

silence-hides-violence

Don’t bear in silence,silence kills.Help yourself and help others.When you see such violence don’t be a silent spectator,ring their bell for atleast the violence stops for sometime.Bell bajo is campaign, asking you the common man to bring domestic violence to a halt.

Please click the links to read more on the domestic violence written by my fellow bloggers.

Solilo–Domestic violence awareness learn to say no

IHM– Is a known devil really better

Swaram — A part or apart

Lakshmi — Living our own lives

Smitha – Send me no roses

Deeps–Another voice against domestic violence

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